A Texan goes to Toronto for a vacation. He grabs a cab at the airport and tells the driver he’s heading to the Royal York Hotel. As they ...
A man calls home to his wife and says, "Honey, I’ve been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss and several of his friends. W...
Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peter’s Square. The first Catholic man proudly tells his friends, "...
A man in a bar saw a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he commented, "You look terrible. What's the...
A neighborhood kid was looking for ways to earn money. He knocked on the door of one house, and when the man answered, the boy asked, ...
A woman, renewing her driver's license, was asked to state her occupation. She hesitated, tapping her chin thoughtfully, uncertain how...
Bob was a bit taken aback when his wife suggested the strip club for his birthday. "Really? A strip club?" he asked, wide-eyed. ...
A high school recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of the girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the ba...
A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passengers had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage, a little monk...
Those of us old enough to remember when the phone was wired to the wall, usually in the kitchen, can relate to this story. I loved this re...
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant a...
One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she noticed a strange little man at the bottom of her garden. “You’re a g...
An old woman handed her bank card to the teller and said, “I would like to withdraw $10.” The teller replied politely, “For withdrawals ...
An elderly couple return to a Mercedes dealership to find the salesman had just sold the car they were interested in to a beautiful, leggy...
An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor said she should run ten miles a day for thirty days. This, he promised, w...
The next time you are tempted to say something hurtful to someone just because you're angry, you might want to stop and remember this ...
Teacher: "If I gave you two cats, and another two cats, and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." ...
An Arab Sheik was admitted to St. Vincent's Hospital for heart surgery, but prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to store his bloo...
A Lexus mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of an LS460 when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiol...
One of the matrons of the church was cooking a pot of her famous beans for the church potluck. Her son, Little Johnny, came running throug...
Paddy staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen. He...
Dear Lions Bay School, God bless you for the lovely transistor radio I won at your recent senior luncheon. I'm 84 years old and live ...
My husband left his shoes in the middle of the living room floor. I saw them last night — they’re hard to miss. He’s 6’4” and wears size ...
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question. "Johnny, if there were five...
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the director, "What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionali...
Imagine being 75 and you're sat thinking about your life and how you never went swimming in the sea on a warm night because your thigh...
A life-long city man, tired of the rat race, decided he was going to give up the city life, move to the country, and become a chicken farm...
After 60 years together, the couple’s three kids, all successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honour. “Happy Anniversary, Mom and ...
Ever hear the story about the frog that fell into a deep rut in the road and, try as he might, he could not get out? Mrs. Frog, standing a...
A group of male friends, all turning 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed they would meet at Wetherspoon...
"It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeepi...
Week after week, the man came to his pastor with a big problem. "When I go to bed, I can't sleep because I'm afraid of monst...
One cold night, a billionaire met an old poor man outside. He asked him, "Don't you feel cold being outside and not wearing any c...
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