A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning. "I'm not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks,

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over, glances at the clock, and sees that it’s half past three in the morning.

"I’m not getting out of bed at this hour," he mutters, pulling the blanket over his head.

But the knocking continues—louder this time.

His wife nudges him. "What if it’s an emergency?"

Grumbling, he drags himself out of bed, stumbles to the front door, and opens it to find a very drunk man standing there, swaying slightly.

"Mate," slurs the drunk, "you gotta help me. I need a push."

The man stares at him in disbelief. "Are you serious? It’s 3:30 in the morning! I’m not helping you! Go sober up!" He slams the door shut and stomps back to bed.

"Who was that?" his wife asks sleepily.

"Just some drunk guy asking for a push."

She sits up and glares at him. "Really? Have you forgotten the time when our car broke down late at night and a stranger helped us? What if that guy had said no? Have a little compassion!"

The husband groans. He knows she’s right. So, sighing heavily, he throws on his coat, trudges back to the front door, and calls out into the dark.

"Hey! You still out there?"

From the shadows, the drunk man’s voice replies, "Yeah!"

"Do you still need a push?"

"Oh yes, please, mate!"

The husband sighs. "Alright, where are you?"

There’s a pause, then the drunk man cheerfully calls out:

"Over here! On your swing set!"