A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. My farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've

A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. My farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've probably had about twenty of them since I walked into your waiting room! Not a peep, not a whiff, just pure, unadulterated, invisible relief. It's quite remarkable, really. I like to think of myself as a silent, odorless flatulence ninja."

The doctor, a young man who was struggling to keep a straight face, scribbled something on his pad. "I see," he said, trying to sound professional. "And how long has this... remarkable phenomenon been occurring, Mrs. Henderson?"

"Oh, for years, dear," she chirped, adjusting her spectacles. "Ever since my husband started complaining about my 'air pollution,' I've been perfecting my technique. I can let one go while knitting, during a church sermon, even mid-sentence in a lively conversation, and no one is ever the wiser! It's my little secret superpower!" She then leaned in conspiratorially. "I once let one go right next to a sniffing bloodhound, and even he didn't react!"

The doctor cleared his throat, trying to compose himself. "Well, Mrs. Henderson," he began, "this is certainly… unique. Tell me, have you tried any over-the-counter remedies? Perhaps something for digestive aid?"

"Goodness no!" she exclaimed. "Why would I? It's not a problem! It's a convenience! My bridge club ladies are always commenting on how fresh the air is around me. Little do they know, it's thanks to my stealthy internal ventilation system!" She then paused, a thoughtful look on her face. "Though, now that you mention it, Doctor, I have been having a bit of trouble with my hearing lately. Do you think that could be related?"

The doctor leaned back in his chair, a slow smile spreading across his face. "Mrs. Henderson," he said, trying his very best not to outright laugh, "I believe I know exactly what your problem is. And it's not your gas. It's your nose. You've gone and broken your sense of smell!"

Mrs. Henderson's eyes widened. "My goodness! Is that why my rose garden hasn't smelled as lovely this year? And I thought the neighbor's dog had stopped bathing!" She then let out a rather robust, audible, and distinctly not odorless fart, startling both herself and the doctor.

She looked at him, mortified. "Oh dear! That one certainly wasn't silent! And… oh my, that's not good, is it?"

The doctor, now laughing openly, shook his head. "No, Mrs. Henderson. But at least now we know why you came to see me today!"