Bill wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean f

He sits up and sees his clothes in front of him, all clean and neatly folded. That’s strange. The last thing he remembers is dancing on a table, declaring himself the "King of Karaoke," before falling face-first into a bowl of nachos.

He looks around. The room is spotless. His shoes are arranged, and his phone is charging—wait, charging?! He never remembers to do that!

He takes the aspirin, drinks the water, and musters up the courage to get out of bed. He notices a note on the mirror. It reads:

“Good morning, sweetheart! Breakfast is on the table. Love you! ❤️”

Bill is now convinced—he must have died. He’s in heaven.

With a pounding heart (and head), he stumbles into the kitchen, and there she is—his wife, humming happily, flipping pancakes. A heavenly smell fills the room. The table is set with eggs, toast, fresh juice, and—oh dear Lord—his favorite coffee.

Something is very, very wrong.

He sits down cautiously and asks, “Uh… honey? What happened last night?”

She turns around with a sweet smile. “Oh, you had a little too much fun, dear. You came home, fell over the couch, and knocked yourself out.”

Bill gulps. “And… you’re not mad?”

She laughs. “Of course not! Why would I be?”

Now Bill is terrified. His wife never just lets things slide. This is the woman who gave him a full one-hour lecture for forgetting to take the trash out.

Trying to solve the mystery, he calls his son over. “Hey, buddy. What happened when I got home?”

The son shrugs. “Oh, Mom dragged you to the bedroom, but when she tried to take off your clothes, you screamed, ‘STOP! I’M MARRIED!’”

Bill leans back in his chair and smiles. Mystery solved.

Moral of the story: Even when you’re out of your mind, stay loyal. It might just save your life.