A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again. She put an ad in the local newspaper that read: "Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again.

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

"Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me, and must still be good in bed. All applicants, apply in person."

The next day, the widow heard her doorbell ring.

When she opened the door, she was shocked to see a gray-haired gentleman in a wheelchair, missing both arms and both legs.

She stared.

"Can I help you?" she asked, trying to hide her surprise.

The elderly man smiled warmly and said, "I’m here about your ad."

The widow raised an eyebrow. "Sir, do you really think you meet the requirements?"

The man nodded confidently. "Absolutely! I’m in your age group. I can’t beat you—I don’t have arms. I can’t run around on you—I don’t have legs."

The widow paused, considering this. Then she asked, "And what about the last part? Are you still good in bed?"

The old man grinned.

"Ma’am… how do you think I rang the doorbell?"